Search Results

When Phasmophobia hit Steam in 2020, it ignited a type of cooperative play that is still gaining popularity today, with games like Lethal Company dominating the scene–and competitors like Terrorbytes trying to chomp out their own footing. But Phasmophobia is definitely the progenitor of this trend, or at least the one that shot it into the stratosphere. Phasmophobia is a cooperative horror game where up to four players assume the roles of ghost hunters tasked with identifying different types of ghosts haunting various locations. Armed with paranormal investigation tools like EF meters, flashlights, thermometers (ghosts are cold) and UV lights, players must gather evidence of supernatural activity while avoiding the ghost's wrath. The goal is to correctly identify the ghost type without being killed, which increases in intensity as the investigation progresses. Playing Phasmophobia can be legitimately intense, and that’s probably why so many players are drawn to it. It’s also wildly unpredictable. Also, video game intensity tends to lead to moments of hilarity.  One of the things that makes Phasmophobia so alluring beyond the co-op shenanigans is its dedication to its style of realistic. This lends to its incredible atmosphere, which, in turn ups the intensity. But it also has really informative sound design that helps amp up the scares even further. Now that Phasmophobia  has released on consoles, you and your friends really have no excuse not to gear up and look for ghosts.

This year we’re putting together a list of 31 Retro Horror games. Games that have come from dead console generations, back to haunt us. Sadly, not all of these games will be available for you to play due to the complicated nature of video game preservation. However, we’re going to note if it’s possible to play them on modern hardware. We’re going to be covering games from the Seventh Generation (PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Wii) and earlier. So basically anything before 2006. Day 28 The Thing  The Thing is my favorite horror film and probably one of the best films ever made. It has had two sequels: The Thing , which was released in theaters in 2011 and The Thing , a lesser known video game that explores what happens after the film that was released during the sixth console generation–the PlayStation 2 era.  Both of these sequels to The Thing  (both also named The Thing , which is annoying) take the film’s conclusion in a different direction. In the video game, you play as a special forces operative who is investigating the events of the film. The game plays like most third person shooters from that era. This includes an annoying first person move that eliminates your ability to move. The main enemy type in the game can’t be killed by gunfire alone. Taking monster killing a step further than even Dead Space, you not only have to kill the monster with bullets, you also have to burn them with a flamethrower to finish the job. Too bad you can’t stomp them, too. There are also multiple NPCs that you can encounter through gameplay that help out in various ways–like opening doors, or healing the player and other NPCs. Just like in the film, paranoia runs deep as characters suspect you to be a creature, and in a fun twist, they can become one too. If an NPC doesn’t trust you enough they can outright attack you, so you have to make sure you don’t accidentally shoot them (probably not good to do that anyways) otherwise they might turn sour. But you don’t know if they are monsters themselves, so it does a decent job of reinforcing the themes from the film. While The Thing is hard to play these days, there will be a remake coming out in the next few weeks. This brings The Thing to modern consoles so modern audiences can finally play this somewhat obscure horror classic.

This year we’re putting together a list of 31 Retro Horror games. Games that have come from dead console generations, back to haunt us. Sadly, not all of these games will be available for you to play due to the complicated nature of video game preservation. However, we’re going to note if it’s possible to play them on modern hardware. We’ll be covering games from the Seventh Generation (PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Wii) and earlier. So basically anything before 2006. Day 18 Alone in the Dark Alone in the Dark is the first game to really codify all of these preexisting video game notions into what we would come to know as the survival horror genre. Alone in the Dark is called the granddaddy of survival horror–and for good reason–it was “first” in a lot of ways. In fact, it was this game that would make Shinji Mikami choose the fixed angle third person view for Resident Evil .  While Alone in the Dark has had a few sequels, and a few remakes (one of which released just this year) the original game probably stands as the most important work in the series. In fact, I’d argue that without Alone in the Dark the horror game landscape would be much different–and would probably have stayed more in the point and click realm for longer than it did. Alone in the Dark has both aged poorly and pretty well. It suffers from horribly clunky tank controls that are floaty but sometimes require laser precision. Actions are done through a menu instead of being dedicated to keys. If you want to open a chest you have to select “open” and then approach the chest.  Puzzles in  Alone in the Dark have had to be the inspiration for Resident Evil , also. Some of the puzzles, especially towards the end of the game, feel a little absurd. But they’re not any stranger than what the Resident Evil series has come up with. If you want to play Alone in the Dark these days, it’s available on steam as part of a bundle that includes 2008’s Alone in the Dark along with the original trilogy of Alone in the Dark games. Ironically, the remakes have done little to make Alone in the Dark standout from the survival horror pack. I’d almost recommend trying to play the clunky original–or at least watch a let’s play of it–before playing any of the remakes.

This year we’re putting together a list of 31 Retro Horror games. Games that have come from dead console generations, back to haunt us. Sadly, not all of these games will be available for you to play due to the complicated nature of video game preservation. However, we’re going to note if it’s possible to play them on modern hardware. We’ll be covering games from the Seventh Generation (PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Wii) and earlier. So basically anything before 2006. Day 27 Uninvited When I first mentioned this list to my colleagues, Aaron mentioned Uninvited . That’s a game I haven’t thought about in years. When I think of Uninvited I immediately think of the NES version, but it was actually released originally on the Mac way back in 1986.  Uninvited  is a game unlike a lot of the others I covered in this series recently: it can be genuinely scary. Okay, maybe not scary on a level that horror games today can achieve, but back in the days of internal midi speakers and low res pixelated graphics, Uninvited was terrifying. And honestly, it still manages to hold up atmospherically. But it’s not the terror aspect that makes Uninvited so effective: it’s the gameplay. You can explore the haunted mansion ( it’s always a mansion) at your own pace, discovering its horrors as you go. It's a bit of a slow burn, but it's great in building tension. Uninvited doesn’t have the same legacy as other games in this list, but it did inspire classics like Shadowgate and Deja Vu –both of those titles eventually making their way to the NES, too.  If you want to play Uninvited these days, you can actually pick it up as part of the Macventures Series Collection on Steam, or by itself. These versions are a bit alien to me, however, as I grew up playing the NES version with their somewhat updated graphics. But to play that version you’d have to get ahold of old hardware.

This year we’re putting together a list of 31 Retro Horror games. Games that have come from dead console generations, back to haunt us. Sadly, not all of these games will be available for you to play due to the complicated nature of video game preservation. However, we’re going to note if it’s possible to play them on modern hardware. We’re going to be covering games from the Seventh Generation (PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Wii) and earlier. So basically anything before 2006. Day 26 Nocturne I’ve been covering some pretty well known games for this series, so I wanted to change it up a bit with Nocturne . This game is a deep cut for many, and it has an interesting backstory and connection with a much larger franchise. That might be a bit of a surprise, but it makes sense in context. Nocturne is a survival horror game that had the concept of Control before SCP or anything like it existed. You play as The Stranger, an agent in a US organization called The Spook House. Your job is to investigate and more than often eliminate paranormal issues as they pop up across the US. The sort of things The Stranger tangles with run from the mundane like werewolves and vampires, to the absurd–like finding Al Capone’s factory that churns out undead gangsters. And this is a game that takes itself very seriously. Nocturne never had any sequels, sadly. But The Spook House and one of its agents make an appearance in Blair Witch Volume I: Rustin Parr . I’m all for the extended Blair Witch universe. But not really.  If you want to play Nocturne today you’ll have to settle for myabandonware.com . This is a game that has faded into obscurity. But it really deserves to be remembered and even played again. The legacy of Nocturne sort of lived on for a while through the Bloodrayne Series , developer Terminal Reality’s next major franchise. But even that IP is fading into obscurity.

Wandavision was unlike any other MCU Television show before it, and since. It is solidly in the beginning of the new, definitely canon MCU TV experience. And it came in like a breath of fresh air, with some impressive originality and a mystery that had viewers looking at the smallest clues. It’s too bad it ended on a disappointing note in Wandavision . Meanwhile, I think I’m one of the only people that thought that Wanda Maximoff had it coming in  Multiverse of Madness.   Agatha All Along picks up where Wandavision left off. Agatha Harkness is trapped in Westview, unable to remember who she really is–and now completely without her power. She is eventually released from her spell by the enigmatic (and delightful) “Teen”, played by Joe Locke. But not without running into Aubrey Plaza’s Rio Vidal first–and there is so much sexual tension between Plaza and Kathryn Hahn’s Agatha Harkness you can cut it with a knife. It’s obvious within minutes of the first episode that Agatha All Along is the MCU’s first unapologetically LGTBQIA+ show that has no problem flaunting its gay characters. But it also ends up being a campy sendup to some of Marvel comics’ obscure magic users. Surprisingly, there doesn’t seem to be as much early backlash as other MCU TV shows have gotten recently–like the backlash around She Hulk , and I’m not talking about some of the (mostly valid) concerns around the lower quality CGI used in that show. Maybe those audiences are staying away as they realize that not every MCU show has to be made for them. Agatha All Along was made for Kathryn Hahn. She was fantastic as Agatha Harkness in Wandavision, so it was a no-brainer for her to come back for her own series. I always felt that the MCU was at its best when it’s character driven, and Agatha All Along puts together an ensemble of characters that are rightfully wary of Agatha but are still (somewhat) willing to risk their lives on The Witch’s Road. This mystical path leads to wish fulfillment, and a way for Agatha Harkness to regain the powers she lost. I have to wonder what impact Agatha All Along will have on the greater MCU. Maybe we’ll finally get to see Mephisto since he was part of popular fan theories that were being thrown around while Wandavision was on the air. Perhaps Joe Locke’s “Teen” will end up being one of Mephisto’s minions, or maybe Mesphisto himself–especially with all of the mystery surrounding the masking of Teen’s identity. I’m going to be looking out for any references to Doctor Doom–who is a powerful magic user, and has recently been announced as the Big Bad of the MCU’s Phase 5.  This nine episode minisieres will be running on Disney+ through October 30th

This year we’re putting together a list of 31 Retro Horror games. Games that have come from dead console generations, back to haunt us. Sadly, not all of these games will be available for you to play due to the complicated nature of video game preservation. However, we’re going to note if it’s possible to play them on modern hardware. We’re going to be covering games from the Seventh Generation (PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Wii) and earlier. So basically anything before 2006. Day 25 The 7th Guest The 7th Guest is THE original full motion video (FMV) horror game. I mean, I guess Night Trap sorta counts, But The 7th Guest was one of the first games to utilize CD-ROM technology to the max. It featured (for the time) high-quality FMV and a large amount of audio data that could only be stored on CD–like voice tracks and music. Its popularity helped cement CD-ROM as the future of game distribution.  Many consider it a forefather of interactive movie-style games and psychological horror titles, paving the way for other classics like Myst and  Resident Evi l. Okay, I’ve said a lot of games paved the way for Resident Evil in this series. But seriously. That’s why Resident Evil was so popular–it checked a lot of boxes, and well. There were a couple of sequels to The 7th Guest like The 11th Hour and The 13th Doll, but neither were as cutting edge or captured people’s imaginations like The 7th Guest. I would even say that The 7th Guest inspired Roberta Williams to make Phantasmagoria . This game is a big deal. If you want to play 7th Guest these gays there's a wonderful VR remake that used volumetric filming with new actors to replace the old FMV. It also includes new puzzles that are better suited for VR.  There is also a 25th Anniversary edition available on modern consoles as well as Steam.

Narrative games are great–usually using still images and simple animations to convey a story. And while they’re very commonplace as far as games go, there are stand out examples. 2023’s Slay the Princess turns out to be an exceptional take on the narrative game–one that subverts expectations and is as absurd as it is grotesque. At least, that’s what I was getting from snippets of reviews and user impressions coming into this review. I didn’t want spoilers, but it’s nice to get an idea of why something has Overwhelmingly Positive reviews on Steam Slay the Princess ’s story unfolds based on your decisions, but also on what you believe. If you insist the princess is dead in the opening scenario, and you accept your fate then you succeed. But in Slay The Princess  the more you buck and fight and try to outsmart your fate, the worse it gets for you. At least those were my initial impressions. But Slay the Princess  is like a narrative onion with layers of body horror, existential dread and ancient evils. It’s almost like the Stanley Parable in a way, with the game’s reality changing depending on your choices. Slay the Princess is fully voice acted by two people .Jonathan Sims brings the Narrator to life, as well as the protagonist and any of their–er–alter egos. Nichole Goodnight voices all incarnations of the princess. The entire game is brought to life by their voice acting, as most of the game is depicted in a rudimentary drawn style. While it’s done well, it’s just enough to give you visual cues as to the goings on. Not only does The Pristine Cut bring additional content for free to those who already own the game, it also brings Slay the Princess onto consoles. For fans of the original; you’re probably clamoring for that new content. I didn’t actually play the original, so I only have the context of what the new stuff is through a handy dandy review guide I was provided–and the excitement of the community. There is a lot of love for this game, and it makes sense. Slay the Princess resonates so much with its fans because it has a surprising amount to say about the truth of life. Yes, believe it or not, the game where a princess sprouts blades from her body and relentlessly kills you over and over again (as one example) has something to say about what it means to be alive. But I don’t want to spoil too much for those who are uninitiated. I usually only offer high praise to narrative games that stand out in a significant way, and Slay the Princess is one of those games. It’s a bummer I missed it when it released last year–it was stuck somewhere in a “to-do” pile–but I’m glad it’s getting new life on consoles and new content for its loyal fans. If you’re a fan of narrative horror games, Slay the Princess The Pristine Cut is something special.  A PlayStation 5 key was given to us for the purpose of this review

This year we’re putting together a list of 31 Retro Horror games. Games that have come from dead console generations, back to haunt us. Sadly, not all of these games will be available for you to play due to the complicated nature of video game preservation. However, we’re going to note if it’s possible to play them on modern hardware. We’ll be covering games from the Seventh Generation (PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Wii) and earlier. So basically anything before 2006. Day 24 Dracula Unleashed We’re back to full motion video (FMV) video games, but this time we’re going a little further back with Dracula Unleashed . Released during the era of Sewer Shark and Night Trap , Dracula Unleashed can be considered those games’ forgotten cousin, as it was also one of the earliest titles to make use of FMV. The gameplay is simple point and click. You play as Alexander Morris who is looking into the strange circumstances surrounding his brother’s death. Spoilers: it’s vampires. I mean, otherwise we wouldn’t be trying to unleash Dracula. While the FMV sequences can be a bit corny by today’s standards, they are still pretty well done.  Sadly, while Sewer Shark and Night Trap have been rereleased recently, the last release of Dracula Unleashed was in 2002 in the form o an ultra rare interactive DVD. (And yes, I’m going to try to get one for my collection now.) It even includes blooper reels and other extras alongside DVD quality video.

This year we’re putting together a list of 31 Retro Horror games. Games that have come from dead console generations, back to haunt us. Sadly, not all of these games will be available for you to play due to the complicated nature of video game preservation. However, we’re going to note if it’s possible to play them on modern hardware. We’re going to be covering games from the Seventh Generation (PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Wii) and earlier. So basically anything before 2006. Day 23 Darkstalkers: the Night Warriors Okay, okay, this isn’t really a “horror” game so much as it’s a horror themed fighting game. It’s not meant to scare you. But come on! It’s monsters fighting monsters. That’s pretty horrifying. Darkstalkers: the Night Warriors is also a pretty underrated game that flew under the radar for a lot of people. The plot is pretty cool: there is an alien race going to invade earth, and only the world’s monsters are able to defend earth. Why they have to fight each other to do it, I’m not entirely sure.  While Darkstalkers isn’t really talked about much these days, its characters are constantly showing up in Capcom fighting games. The wildly popular Marvel Vs. Capcom 2 features Darkstalker characters like the ever-popular Felicia. Darkstalkers: the Night Warriors uses the same fighting system as Street Fighter II with a few tweaks. Originally developed as a Universal Monsters fighting game, getting the rights proved to be too difficult so they tweaked the project a bit to bypass the issue. That’s why you have vampire succubus Morrigan and cat lady Felicia instead of Dracula and the Wolfman.  If you want to play Darkstalkers: the Night Warriors these days, you’re in luck: Capcom has been releasing its retro fighting games in collections, and Darkstalkers made it into the Capcom Fighting Collection . They even included a couple of Darkstalkers games that were never released in NA.

It's hard to ever know what to expect out of Agatha All Along and Episode 7 certainly opens on the unexpected, with Lillia dressed all in white, falling in an infinite black space. If you didn't hit skip recap, Disney spoiled you a little on the fact that this episode might be more about Lillia and her time skips than anything else, but we frown on spoiling ourselves right before the show starts like that. After a beautiful but concerning performance from Patti LuPone, we're back with Agatha and Teen on the Road. Agatha's doing what she does best and tormenting him. He's been trying to read her mind but can't, so she tells him to just ask her questions. His first one cuts right to the chase: "Where's Rio?" Seems she can also be tormented and she quickly tells him "Not that question." She asks if she has any more questions but pretty soon it's more about her prying into his mind. She wants to know what he wants at the end of the Road, and insinuates she knows his mom very well as her "ex best friend." "I have a mom. " Teen says. "I'll get what I want at the end of the Road." If this was Agatha trying to play nice, Teen's having none of it. He asks if Wanda Maximoff is really dead, but even though Agatha says she saw a body, she still says "No. Maybe." and basically shrugs it off with more vagaries. He challenges her, and insinuates she's never been on the Road, and effectively ends the conversation. A large castle looms ahead, where the group will find their next trial. The wonderful transformation begins here. Teen's sporting Malificent's look, and Agatha's of course THE wicked witch. There's a tarot card deck on the table and as soon as Teen touches it, a timer flips over. He attempts to read for Agatha, but it's not exactly his forte, and when he places a card on the table, a sword drops from the ceiling. Unfortunately, it's one of many, many swords hanging over their head, so he'd better learn tarot pretty quickly. "I wish Lillia was here" he sighs. And then, she is. It seems she and Jen did indeed get sucked under the earth, but are alive and mostly ok (though totally filthy) in a subterranean tunnel system with glowing roots. It seems Lillia's been lost to time a little bit. "I was falling." Jen doesn't understand that she's not referring to the fall we saw in the opening sequence, and is more concerned about how confused Lillia is, seemingly having just "wisped" away. She doesn't know where she is, and doesn't remember any part of the apparent journey she and Jen have been taking under the Road. She tries to recall and Jen fills her in, saying she told her to go down the "gross" path and find shelving, also letting her know that Teen, the son of the Scarlet Witch, kicked them off the road. Lillia's alarm is unmistakable, and she asks how she knew. "You told me," says Jen. This begins a series of vignettes where we actually get to see Lillia beginning her training in witchcraft in Sicily. It paints a better picture of who Lillia is, and the things she's struggled with. Lillia's someone who doubts herself and always has. Her strange time trips have also made her seem weird and out of touch with reality, and both of these factors have kept her isolated. She encourages her to not sell herself short, but it's clear she doesn't feel good enough. Back in the present underground with Jen, Lillia's distraught and explains the time jumps to Jen telling her that it's getting worse. But before long, things start making more sense. And while Jen was initially dismissive or at the very least irritated by frequently having to remind Lillia what she actually said, she actually softens visibly. She's suddenly wisped away again though, this time to the sword room Agatha and Teen are in trying to figure out the puzzle. Teen's happy to see her, but she doesn't feel the same, irate at him for concealing his powers. But as she's seething he's reading her thoughts and reassuring her that he didn't know and if he would have he would've saved Alice. They make peace only after she refers to him as Teenager, which elicits the funniest line in the series so far out of Jen (Sasheer Zamata). "Damn, using his full name!" This particular part of the episode manages to be hilarious and emotional simultaneously and that's what takes this whole episode to another level. There are so many heart to hearts happening at the same time Hahn and Zamata are punching it up with a whole lot of humor. It seems like everyone's making amends. Lillia realizes she has no beef with Teen, and tells him the truth about the sigil and how she placed it so that he would have time to come to grips with it, essentially. But they're still in a D&D style trap room with swords that fly down from the ceiling and a neat little lowering sword ceiling. They've let the puzzle go unsolved during all the amends and now the trial's reinforcing its chokehold on them. Lillia's again facing her own failures, or so she thinks as she wonders what she did wrong, only to end up back in time again. Desperate to stop it so she can help everyone she's physically tapping her head and chanting "Stop stop stop stop stop" but the visions don't stop. She's back with her mentor again, and her present age. Her mentor gently inquires about her life and what she's missed. Lillia's quick to disparage herself. She's asked if she has a coven, and when she scoffs at the notion that a witch needs a coven, she says she'd rather be a fraud and a hermit. Then we're back at the beginning of the root path and Jen's starting to put the pieces together about Lillia. Meanwhile, Lillia finds Teen's spellbook, and re-remembers what they're supposed to be doing. Jen asks about the time jumps that Lillia mentioned having when she was younger and she confesses the reason they stopped was because she wanted to, because all she saw was death. Then they see the shelving, and hear Agatha and Teen bickering, and we're back to the future but everyone's caught up. Teen and Lillia are cool, and the tarot master, the fraud, becomes the only one with the answers. But there needs to be a question, and after some bickering about the validity of tarot which Agatha throws shade on, Lillia takes over. They've determined that Teen is to be the querant (queer-ant, he quips) and they have to have a question. After some frustrated wheelturning he blurts out "Am I William or Billy?" The swords stop descending and she begins to read for him. Jen backs up Lillia pointing out that she knows what she's doing and she launches into it. Her entire reading is extremely accurate for Teen but a sword still drops as though something's still wrong. It's not working. Agatha, reckless, obnoxious and angry, takes the deck and Lillia goes back again, with flashes back to her time with the coven and finally back to her mentor. Her mentor inquires as to why she came and she says she wants her power back -- but it was never gone. "I'm a forgotten woman" Lillia cries out in frustration and fear. "Remember yourself." We've been doing these recaps for 7 episodes with this one, but I feel like further describing everything from this point forward spoils the perfection of Patti LuPone's performance in this final act, and that's something I don't want to do. What follows is a testament to the power of great writing and great actors like LuPone, who can elevate something beyond what might have been something very good and make it unforgettable. Every single thing Lillia's been through, every line spoken by LuPone, paints a portrait of a woman who's lost herself, lost her way, and sold herself short. When she takes her power back and saves them all (which, spoilers, but trust me, the magic is in the details) it's something you just have to witness yourself to really appreciate, and to say I teared up is an understatement. If you've ever felt that you weren't good enough, or that you were a fraud or weirdo - if you're neurodivergent or just different for a reason you didn't choose, you'll see yourself in the anguish and fear Lillia has, and you'll be cheering through tears as she realizes who she really is and lays waste to every obstacle in her way. It's an episode that's worthy of watching even if you never cared about Marvel - a story that's important and relevant and can connect to women (and people) of all ages who feel like they don't belong and can't do it. I can't do it justice in a recap, and I can't recommend watching this episode enough. Not only that, but there's some third act reveals in the B story that not only confirm our suspicions, but have serious implications. I'm a little sad we're about to run out of Agatha All Along but with this episode I can solidly say this is my favorite MCU TV show and I've loved the entire journey. Let's see where the Road takes us.

This year we’re putting together a list of 31 Retro Horror games. Games that have come from dead console generations, back to haunt us. Sadly, not all of these games will be available for you to play due to the complicated nature of video game preservation. However, we’re going to note if it’s possible to play them on modern hardware. We’ll be covering games from the Seventh Generation (PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Wii) and earlier. So basically anything before 2006. Day 22 Maniac Mansion While not entirely terrifying, Maniac Mansion plays on horror tropes from silver screen monster movie clichés. It’s more of a comedy than a horror game, but since you’re sneaking around a mansion where a scientist is stealing brains to use in his experiments, and a green and a purple talking tentacle are roaming about, it’s pretty horror adjacent. I talked about Roberta Williams and Sierra On-Line a few days ago, and how important their work was to adventure games. The other side of that same coin is the work LucasArts was doing for adventure games. They would eventually release games like The Secret of Monkey Island , Full Throttle, Sam n’ Max Hit the Road , and many more classic SCUMM engine driven point and click adventure games. These games were my childhood. Maniac Mansion has you choose between a number of characters to explore Dr. Fred’s mansion and stop Sandy from giving her brains to him. There are various ways you can get your characters into trouble. One of the most famous bits is the ability to microwave a hamster–something that is mentioned in Maniac Mansion’s sequel. It was so notorious Nintendo’s subsequent printings of the NES version of the game had that part censored–among other censorship concessions that were made for the NA release. Maniac Mansion isn’t hard to play these days. You can download and play it right on steam. If you want more of a modernized take on the same idea, Day of the Tentacle is out for modern consoles and is a sequel to Maniac Mansion . While a lot of the gameplay has changed, Day of the Tentacle is a genuinely funny game. Sorry, I mean, scary. (It’s not scary.)